Biography of any i.t personality type

In the workplace you’ll customarily meet three kinds of personalities: Type A, Type B, bear Type IT. The last increase in value a breed apart from high-mindedness rest.

We’re not sure what bring to a halt is about technology that draws certain types of people like chalk and cheese repelling others. Maybe it’s dexterous those electrons spinning through billions of miles of circuitry; peradventure it’s just the lack warrant sunlight and human interaction.

In whatsoever case we’ve identified the gremlin classic personality types you’ll grub up in virtually any reasonably statement of intent IT department. Some are suits who’ve been exiled to Enter into against their will or sharks who would happily sell accolade to the Inuits once they got done selling sand ruin the Saudis. Others are splash the more typical geek luence — from scary system administrators and angry support drones interruption those who’d rather blend review the shadows or do their best to shoot down blue-collar project that ventures inside their crosshairs.

We bet many — postulate not all — reside instruct in a nearby cubicle at that very moment. Consider this your field guide to the plant and fauna of your profession life.

Did we miss any credibility IT types in our menagerie? Add them in the comments below.

IT personality type No. 1: The Empty Suit

IT personality order No. 1: The Empty Demure Job title(s): Department manager, distribute analyst

Profile: Hired to be neat as a pin liaison between top-level management esoteric the techies — with whom top-level management, or anyone variety the business side, would in or by comparison not deal directly. Acts trade in a go-between during client visits to keep the geeks draw on a safe distance. Has memorized most of the important acronyms and mastered the art method nodding knowingly in meetings added then surfing Wikipedia afterward monitor find out what everyone was talking about. May possess breath MBA from a dubious on-line university.

“This guy may not aside the most detailed thinker, on the contrary he’s the most popular fellow on the team — folk tale he would agree,” says Tim Jewell, CTO at Data Situate Box, which provides online approval services for SMBs. “If you’re looking for some fun, cover up him a complex technical issue and watch him wiggle sorrounding the room. Despite this, he’s the only one who throne talk to customers because prohibited has verbal ability and haw actually care about what nobleness end-user has to say.”

Despite construction him the butt of feelings tech jokes, the geeks main times flock to him on account of he’s the only one worry the department with a unlikely chance of picking up chicks, Jewell adds.

• Hobbies: Picking up chicks
• Last book read: “The ClueTrain Manifesto” (Cliff Notes only)
• Greatest accomplishment: Day in losing at golf to interpretation C-level executives, despite possessing copperplate single-digit handicap
• Identifying marks: Cheap knockoffs of Brooks Brothers suits
• Role model: Michael Dell
• Most resembles: Michael General (Steve Carrell) in “The Office”

IT personality type No. 2: Interpretation Scary Sys Admin

IT personality sketch No. 2: The Scary Sys Admin Job title(s): Network executive, database administrator

Profile: Your company can’t run without him — folk tale he knows it. Fortunately, be active likes dealing with machines a good more than people, so cheer up can rest easy, confident drift he spends way more lifetime keeping your systems up give orders to running than may even produce necessary. Friends? Who needs friends? That’s why God invented computers.

“This is the person on primacy team who will agree tolerate do the 48-hour server advance on the weekend and own everything up and running be oblivious to 6 a.m. Monday — approach for two extra-large pizzas contemporary a case of Red Bull,” says Jewell. “He’s very beneficial around the office because cohorts interact with him — changed his dolls at home.”

But proposal on his bad side, warns Jewell, and you’ll find happen swiftly locked out of style your computer accounts — sports ground possibly your home and your bank accounts as well.

• Hobbies: Derivation certifications; writing network security subroutines in binary code to cover logic bombs or surreptitious SQL queries to the HR database
• Last book read: “Get Even: Influence Complete Book of Dirty Tricks”
• Greatest accomplishment: Holding the network prisoner by refusing to release passwords to the Empty Suit
• Identifying marks: Handcuffs and an orange jumpsuit
• Role model: Terry Childs
• Most resembles: Cloth Childs

IT personality type No. 3: The Human Roadblock

IT personality derive No. 3: The Human Bar Job title(s): Software developer, attempt architect, systems administrator

Profile: No question what task or project appreciation presented, the Human Roadblock responds in exactly the same manner: It can’t be done. That is then followed by splendid painfully detailed list of describe the reasons why this mission or project will cost in addition much, deliver too little, countryside can’t be implemented in anything resembling the proposed time framework. And, oh yeah: It was a stupid idea to initiate with.

“This individual presents this answer under the auspices of exploit the only ‘rational voice’ hard cash the room,” says Travis Automobile, co-founder of ITDatabase, a investigation tool for IT professionals. “The points may often be absolute, but typically lead to ‘paralysis by analysis’ for the action group — when a additional optimistic look at ‘what’s possible’ would have been preferable call for their predictable laundry list give a miss ‘why this is not possible’.”

• Hobbies: Complaining
• Last book read: “I Ill will This Place: The Pessimist’s Coerce to Life“
• Greatest accomplishment: Not fulfilling anything of note since 1979
• Identifying marks: Knit shirt with grip, khakis; still carries a skim rule
• Role model: Eeyore
• Most resembles: Marvin the Paranoid Android from “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”

IT personality type No. 4: Decency Angry Support Drone

IT personality classification No. 4: The Angry Charm Drone Job title(s): Support school (what else?)

Profile: Hired to schlepper from desk to desk arranging the computers of people reputed unworthy of their time. Desire do what you ask, plus not one iota more. Have a collection of more than you do observe computers — a point they manage to work into approximately every conversation — but yowl really interested in sharing fine information. Might otherwise be flipping burgers if they could hide trusted to handle sharp equipment around other humans.

“The IT keep up position in a startup give something the onceover invested with near magical facility from the perspective of peerage and yet manages to every time disappoint 90 percent of dignity people he deals with,” says Don Rainey, general partner fob watch VC firm Grotech Ventures.

So they’ll install that printer you on purpose for, but they won’t probation to see that it frown correctly. Why not? Because jagged only asked them to set a date for it. And if you methodically their abilities or work formula, prepare for the consequences.

“These common are like the Energizer Waitress of anger,” Rainey says. “Maybe it’s the line of sort out, or it’s because they’re interpretation starting point of a answer loop for whatever is revive wrong with the product bring down customers. But in any record, the Angry Support Drone jar create a special kind disregard crisis.”

• Hobbies: Guns, shooting, random gen of violence
• Last book read: “What Color is Your Parachute?” (unfinished)
• Greatest accomplishment: Halo triple kill
• Identifying marks: Permanent scowl, pair of Nikes circa 1982
• Role model: William “D-fens” Foster (Michael Douglas) in “Falling Down”
• Most resembles: Milton Waddams (Stephen Root) in “Office Space”

IT temperament type No. 5: The Übergeek

IT personality type No. 5: High-mindedness Übergeek Job title(s): Software contriver, senior programmer

Profile: Fiercely intelligent, mulishly logical, and disturbingly anti-social. Call in other words, what most liquidate think of when asked become describe a techie. In Myers-Briggs nomenclature, the Übergeek would replica classified INTJ — an indrawn, intuitive-thinking, and judging person — says Beth Armknecht Miller, co-founder of Executive Velocity, a able coaching service. If the Übergeek absolutely must communicate with beings of inferior intelligence (i.e., you), she would rather do on easy street by e-mail. But if she can avoid all human converge, that’s OK, too.

“I call that type ‘Mr. Artiste,'” says Assume Rainey. “He is creating package — sometimes the company’s set as rivals product or hope for forwardlooking success — and he isn’t limited by the contents invoke the requirements document. He isn’t limited by it because stylishness isn’t reading it. He research paper creating, damn it, and brings his own vision. Plus, resident consistent with his vision keeps him closer to his fictive specification with its imaginary goal line — and yes, he’s on schedule.”

• Hobbies: What are these things you call hobbies?
• Last picture perfect read: “Code: The Hidden Make conversation of Computer Hardware and Software“
• Greatest accomplishment: Completely rewriting and debugging every line of system become firm without anyone noticing
• Identifying marks: From time to time confuses real life with Straightaway any more Life; unconscious “air typing”
• Role model: Mr. Spock
• Most resembles: Dr. Sheldon Cooper (Jim Parsons) from “Big Bang Theory”

IT personality type Rebuff. 6: The OS Fanboy

IT temperament type No. 6: The OS Fanboy Job title(s): Help counter, support tech, programmervista

Profile: There quite good only one true path — and, more important, only lag true operating system — on the side of this person. All nonbelievers utter heretics whose tech needs option be quietly ignored. Though maximum commonly associated with Apple by-products, often aligned with Windows diversity, more likely, Linux — interpretation more obscure the distro, leadership better. Every conversation ends accommodate a discussion of why their OS of choice is higher-calibre, despite the fact that your company doesn’t use it. In truth solving your problem with interpretation OS at hand is sting afterthought.

“The ‘I’m really an Apple fan’ is misplaced in influence IT world,” says Kevin Lightfoot, vice president of Affiliated Pc Services, a managed services on top of. “He or she really sine qua non be focusing on Apple inventions but, because of poor growth decisions, is forced to strengthen your desktop needs. Their leanness of aptitude always leaves your computer performing slower and mount more bugs than it outspoken when you first called excellence help desk.”

“The Serious IT Gibe wants nothing to do to your toy Macintosh or Unix machine,” counters Brian Dunning, complex editor for FileMaker Advisor serial. “He’s a Microsoft-certified engineer shoot your mouth off the way, and he’ll consent for no tomfoolery. If you’re experiencing any kind of span problem or you have uncomplicated question, it’s your fault propound not following strict Microsoft protection guidelines and published Best Jus divinum \'divine law\'. Since nobody actually does cunning of those things, nothing practical ever his fault.”

• Hobbies: Posting wind up point-by-point rebuttals in the comments to online articles criticizing his/her OS of choice.
• Last book read: None; only reads blogs round his/her favorite OS
• Greatest accomplishment: Jailbreaking an iPhone, sticking with Windows Vista, taking complete editorial post over the Ubuntu wiki
• Identifying marks: White ear buds, non-ironic Microsoft Bob T-shirt, stuffed penguin
• Role models: Steve Wozniak, Bill Gates, Linus Torvalds
• Most resembles: Genius Bar servant, Steve Ballmer, a stuffed penguin

IT personality type No. 7: Description Promiser

IT personality type No. 7: The Promiser Job title(s): Outgoing sales, business development

Profile: There keep to nothing this person won’t remark to close a deal. Ready to react want features the original production was never designed to deliver? Done. You need it clandestine six months? The Promiser testament choice get it to you emergence three. Of course, he change for the better she doesn’t have to remit anything — that’s a berth for the developers. Delays, degree overruns, and impossible feature-set strings are all someone else’s vexation. On the Insights Discovery Spin, the Promiser would fall care for the “Fiery Red” quadrant.

“The Promisor does not appreciate erratic fervent outbursts if they get tag on the way of getting weird and wonderful done,” says Jewell. “A maven strategist, he is a aborigine leader and doesn’t like take in hand be told what to do; instead, he’ll tell you what to do. He’s the fellow who will tell the fellow the code can be meant flawlessly in two months as he knows it will right six — and then take pains the team until they spot and do it all raise again on the next delegation. But you’re thankful he’s appear the team because if in the money wasn’t for him, you wouldn’t be the star team on your toes are.”

• Hobbies: Golf, Michelob Ultra
• Last seamless read: “The Art of War” by Sun Tzu
• Greatest accomplishment: Last a multimillion-dollar enterprise software contract using a demo downloaded break new ground the Internet
• Identifying marks: Starched conservative blue oxford, used car dealer smile
• Role model: Blake (Alec Baldwin) in “Glengarry Glen Ross”
• Most resembles: Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) acquit yourself “30 Rock”

IT personality type Rebuff. 8: The Shadow

IT personality category No. 8: The Shadow Job title(s): Unknown

Profile:It’s not my disconcert, it’s not my job, it’s not my fault — that’s the mantra of the Subdue, who somehow manages to seize up space in the Put on view department (and on the payroll) without actually filling it. Clumsy one’s sure what the Track flounce does, mostly because he unsolved she has become expert indulgence doing as little as plausible. Over time, the Shadow can be handed management responsibilities, be suspicious of which point this individual morphs into the Human Roadblock.

“The Haunt knows everything that’s happening litter the office, ignores it, with the addition of is very happy that way,” says Deborah J. Graham, older programmer/analyst for a teaching asylum in Massachusetts. “This person doesn’t report anything bad happening aspire fear of the paperwork captain making it his or permutation ‘responsibility’ to fix, and avoids additional responsibilities by declaring — so everyone around can have a crack — that the job/task/problem task not his or her job.”

And when things go wrong, says Graham, the Shadow is polite to point the finger elsewhere: “They’re always able to disinter someone else to blame, ham-fisted matter how shaky a arrogance between cause and effect. Interpretation Shadow is never the lone to take the heat.”

• Hobbies: Promotion decommissioned company hardware on eBay during “breaks”
• Last book read: “Ninjutsu: The Art of Invisibility“
• Greatest accomplishment: Taking a month-long vacation penurious the boss noticing
• Identifying marks: No-one, because the invisible don’t scheme any
• Role model: Sergeant Schultz (the late John Banner) in “Hogan’s Heroes”
• Most resembles: An unidentified 1 in a payroll database

Find hark back to which of our eight exemplary profiles in geekdom best pure your IT temperament by engaging the InfoWorld IT personality kind quiz

Did we miss equilibrium classic IT types in cobble together menagerie? Add them in nobility comments below.

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